= nikkimountain: TO new beginnings....
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Saturday, May 28, 2005

TO new beginnings....

God works in myserious ways. Just as I woke up this morning feeling like I wanted to die, I got a phone call. A friend..and now business partner has lined up a part as an extra for me in an upcoming movie filming in Halifax. I have to go there for one to three weeks. How ironic. The pay is really good and this project will take me away from all of this. This could not have come at a better time for me. I cant believe it. 4 days from now I will be leaving..and finally a new chapter begins- FINALLY. Someone is looking out for me..this is not a coincidence. My house sold yesterday, and now today I have opportunity knocking at my door. I wish I could have just relaxed and not been so stressed about life, and my awful relationship all along. I have also been scared about moving to the City alone- but I am not alone. I have two good friends, one business partner and another friend who has offered me help with anything I need. No matter how scary this is a step in the right direction. The biggest thing for me now is letting go of my anger. Last night I went into psycho mode with my ex. I was full of hatred and resentment. My biggest goal is to remove that and all negative emotion from my life now. As I once told a man..if you hate your ex- they have won. remove all emotion and you will win. Keeping busy is the key to my succsess. I am going to pur myself into every and any project I possibly can. I am going to start painting again and begin a new social life, and start acknowledging the people who really care and who are really my friends and stop wasting my time on the one person who did nothing but ruin me for seven months. You know what? Hes just not worth it! Let someone else deal with that. Like Greg Behrendt says in hes just not that into you....."he was a man made up entirely of your excuses, stop making excuses for him and he will dissappear from your life" "Be brave my sweet. I know you can get lonely. I know you crave companionship and sex and love so badly that it physically hurts. But I truly believe that the only way you can find out that there is something better out there is to first BELIEVE theres something better out there." What a brilliant writer. It is a very simple philosophy...but profound. I know that there is a man out there who is going to be so happy that I didnt stay with my ex...and I am going to be happy I didn't. History speaks for itslef. I have yet to date any man who I thought was worse than the one before him. This means the next guy WILL be even better....

1 Comments:

At 3:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow, perfectly said. that damn book...congratulations on your new path, and best of luck. please keep posting how it is working for you.

 

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